Help Not Found
by Scutie-Naos
Summary: "Will thinks we're all suffering from PTSD or some other mental shist because of the war," Travis drawled. "Yeah, and now he wants to introduce this, 'help program' so we can deal with it." his twin added. The medic took a deep, calming breath. Perhaps that should have been the other campers' warning sign. It took a lot to piss off Will Solace.


**So something my friend told me she disliked about the PJ series (and I had to resist the urge to slap her when she said this) is that none of the heroes are effected all that much by the war and violence they witness. She said something to the effect of: Eleven year old kids are decapitating hideous beasts and watching their friends bleed out, and they aren't traumatized AT ALL? I told her that that's because it's a CHILDRENS' BOOK, and Riordan doesn't want people harping on him about giving kids PTSD.**

 **But then I just couldn't get it off my mind. So I had to.**

 **Here. Enjoy some heart wrenching angst.**

 **WARNINGS: Mentions of suicide, self harm, depression, PTSD, anxiety, and just general angsty stuff. (Hopefully I haven't scared you all off by now.)**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own anything but Aster and the decision to make these characters suffer.**

 **YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.**

* * *

Chiron deliberately took a long, satisfying sip of coffee before addressing the table of teenagers. He knew he was going to need it.

"Alright Will," he said with a resigned sigh. "What's this all about?" The newly appointed head counselor of Cabin Eleven was looking uncharacteristically grim. His customary warm and cheerful grin was nowhere in sight.

"You know what this is about Chiron," he said. "I called this meeting to propose that we set up some sort of voluntary therapist program at Camp Half Bloo-" This announcement was met with a chorus of groans.

"This again Will?" Travis complained.

"Don't you think you're taking this a little bit far?" Pollux asked.

"We're half-god, we're practically MADE to handle this stuff!" a still intact Jake Mason proclaimed.

"We don't need some shrink prodding us with questions and telling us we're all crazy!" Clarisse growled.

"Yeah, we are crazy." Connor said with a grin.

"Hold up," Percy said, looking thoroughly confused. "I'm confused." No duh Percy. "What's this all about?"

"Will thinks we're all suffering from PTSD or some other mental shist because of the war," Travis drawled.

"Yeah, and now he wants to introduce this, 'help program' so we can deal with it." his twin added. The medic took a deep, calming breath and clasped his hands tight together with much more force than necessary. Perhaps that should have been the other campers' warning sign. It took a lot to piss off Will Solace.

"I don't _think_ we need help I _know_ it," he said in a tone that was almost nearing a growl. But it couldn't have been, because chillaxed, laid back, everything'll-work-out-fine Will Solace didn't growl without due cause. "Tell them Katie." All eyes turned to Katie Gardner, who gave a small jolt and firmly shook her head.

"No. Will, leave Aster out of this."

"Oh come on! You don't want what happened to Aster to happen to anyone else, right?!" Will pushed. "Tell them! Tell them what really happened!"

"I… I... " Katie hid her face in her hands and started trembling. The other counselors were shocked. It wasn't at all like Katie to cry at the drop of a hat.

"But-" Confused Percy again. "Wasn't Aster out walking alone in the woods and monsters got him? Sorry Katie, not trying to rub it in."

"He WAS killed by monsters," Travis sneered, "Except _Will_ seems to think otherwise!"

"I'm sorry Travis, I didn't know you were such an expert in autopsies." the medic said scathingly. "Oh, wait, no you're not. I AM. So until you can prove that the vivid bruising around his neck and distinct lack of abrasions was NOT a result of demise through strangulation, I suggest you shut your piehole!" Katie broke into a fresh round of sobs. Almost a dozen eyes glared at the healer accusingly.

"That was uncalled for Will," Annabeth castigated.

"Yeah, low blow man," Pollux grumbled.

"Look, I don't like upsetting her, but I need to make a point! Go on Katie, tell them! Tell them what you told me!"

"Just shut it Will!" Travis snapped. "Can't you see you're making it worse!?"

"No, no… He's right…" Katie sniffled. "I... When I-" Her voice broke, and she buried her face in her hands. Annabeth rubbed her back soothingly.

"Hey, it's okay. Just take deep breaths. Calm down, it'll be alright…" Will ran a hand through his hair with impatience.

"Why are you being such an asshole?" Drew remarked pointedly from where she was leaning back in her chair filing her nails.

"What?"

"Normally you're a pretty nice guy, what's with the shitty attitude?" she said in a tone that conveyed curiousity, but also that she couldn't care less. Will took another deep breath.

"I'm stressed," he said slowly, "Because yesterday Katie found her younger brother hanging sixty feet in the air from the branches of an oak tree, with a noose of honeysuckle around his neck."

The room was silent, except for the broken sobs of a bereft sister.

"Th- the oak was hysterical," she blubbered, "It said it tried to stop him, but there wasn't anything it could do about-"

"So are you saying Aster was killed by some kind of honeysuckle strangling monster?" Conner cut in. Will glared at him.

"I'm willing to look past the fact that you _could not_ get _any_ more dense in light of the fact that you just don't want to believe me. There was no monster. Alder committed suicide." No one said anything until Percy let out a small, exiguous,

"What?" Annabeth rounded on Chiron, stormy eyes flashing.

"And you were just going to cover this up!?" Chiron pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Annabeth-"

"And it's not just Aster," Will rushed on, sensing that he might just pull this off after all. "Conner, when's the last time Samuel slept through a whole night?" The prankster scowled.

"That's totally different, those are just nightmares."

"Just tell me!" Conner sighed.

"Not once since the battle."

"And Clarisse," Will pushed, "Explain what's been happening with Troy recently." The warrior crossed her arms and glared daggers at Will, but relented.

"He'll wake up thrashing and screaming about how someone's coming to get him. But he won't stop when he realizes he's awake, he'll see enemies all around him and start lashing out at thin air. He once tried smothering me when I told him to get a grip. He usually snaps out of it after a few seconds, but…" She shrugged, and the other kids could tell she was worried.

"But the problem's still there," Will said firmly. "And then there's DeeDee-"

"DeeDee doesn't count!" Conner protested. "She wasn't even here during the battle of Olympus!" Will's eyes narrowed. His fists clenched, knuckles scraping against the ping-pong table.

"DeeDee wakes up crying every single night, and can't fall asleep unless she climbs into my bed and sleeps next to me. Are you trying to tell me that a nine year old girl already burdened with the power of prophecy who watched her family members burn to ash, who listened to their screams, isn't as entitled to her hurt and fear as you, Mr. Battle-Savy?"

"Well, no! No," Connor stammered, "No one should have to go through that, but-"

"Exactly!" Will declared, triumphant. " _No one_ should have to go through that." There was an uncomfortable silence as each counselor fidgeted and looked everywhere but Will. Percy murmured a soft,

"I had no idea…" Annabeth took his hand sympathetically.

"We need help," Will said. "Your friends and siblings, _they_ need help. Because of our godly heritage, we're expected to be stronger than mortals. Because of the dangerous lives we live, we're expected to treat this as the norm. But we're not just part god, we're part human too. We're human, and we're vulnerable to all of humanity's flaws and weaknesses. But because we've ignored this problem, there are campers out there suffering with no one they want to turn to. Think about it this way guys: We're sending _eleven year old kids_ into battle. We're putting them in a situation where they might have to watch their best friend's face get melted off by _acid_ \- which, by the way, is one of the most painful and disturbing ways to die I have ever witnessed. Are they just supposed to grieve for a while and then get past that?! No one could be okay after that kind of experience! And that is why..." Will looked directly at Chiron and leaned forward on the ping-pong table for emphasis. "We need to get a professional who is trained to deal with this kind of situation and equipped to provide help into this camp, fast."

Chiron sighed and looked at the healer morosely.

"Will, I agree with what you're saying. I have watched more generations of demigods suffer and fall prey to post traumatic stress, depression, anxiety, and many such disorders than you could imagine. But understand, there _aren't_ any professionals we can turn to. Finding someone we could trust to keep the gods' existence a secret would require extensive searching, as they would have to possess the sight. There's simply no one I know of out there." Will gaped at him for a moment.

"So… You're saying that there's nothing we can do?"

"As of now, no, I don't think that we-"

"Bullshit."

"Will-"

"Bullshit! I'd be willing to take some sort of training myself, except for the fact that I can't because I'm a KID! Except for the fact that I'm barely THIRTEEN YEARS OLD!"

"Will," Chiron said helplessly.

"YOU CAN'T SENSE THEM LIKE I DO!" Will screamed. "You don't go through every day feeling their pain, whether it's guilt or anger or fear or self hate or simply complete and utter HOPELESSNESS! You can't sense how each one of them thinks they're entirely alone, the only one with these feelings! You don't know how the emotions they carry, they- they're just too big for any one person to handle, and they feel like they can't share something like that! It's too personal! They think no one else in the world could ever understand! But I do, I understand because I see it all the time! YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE SCARS! Just the other day, this girl came into the infirmary with scars on her wrists, some of them were still red, and when I asked her where she got them she told me they were from a CAT! I looked at her like: What kind of medic do you think I am!? CLAW MARKS AND RAZOR CUTS LOOK NOTHING ALIKE! But I couldn't do anything except smile and tell her that she would get better and stay positive, even though positivity was the LAST thing I was feeling right then! I want to help them, more than anything, but I'm USELESS! I can't do anything at all, and I- I just can't go on like this! Don't tell me there's nothing we can do, there HAS to be a solution!" Chiron stared at the dregs of his coffee sadly.

"We'll certainly take this into consideration, and it's something to work on in the future. But-"

"SOME OF THEM MIGHT NOT HAVE OR WANT A FUTURE IF WE CAN'T HELP THEM NOW!" Will sat there breathing heavily, more furious and upset than anyone had ever seen him. The rest of the campers wouldn't meet his burning blue eyes, instead choosing to inspect the grain of the wooden table in shocked, shameful silence.

"Fine." His voice was sharp and broken like shattered glass, with enough force behind that single word to rival a whip crack. "Fine then. That's it." He stood and the metal chair scraped loudly, its accusing squeal clawing at their ears. He stalked out the rec room, muttering to himself, " _Useless,"_ and then they were alone together with thoughts that had either never occurred to them, or they had denied and pushed away for ages. Because it was so unpleasant to think such thoughts.

The thoughts contributed to the silence, harmonizing with the soft sobbing sounds of Katie Gardner.

* * *

 **Oh, you read it? I admire you. That was really sad. 'But was it good?' is the question.** **(It took every ounce of self control I had not to put Solangelo in this.)**

 **Feel free to call me out on how evil I am in the review box.**


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